There’s something about putting my personal journal online that scares me to death. First of all, I haven’t journaled in years and although I certainly find it a therapuetic excercise, just knowing that anyone who happens to find this blog can read about my innermost thoughts scares the living daylights out of me.
You see, although I am considered to be a highly successful person in all areas of my life, I’ve never been one to be publically candid about my views or beliefs. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I absolutely cannot stand any type of conflict. I am a mediator, a soother, a “fixer.” So, when confronted with views that I disagree with, I retreat in silence. This has begun to bother me – a lot. Maybe it’s because I am now a mom (of the most beautiful and intelligent soon to be 1-year old girl on the planet) and I want to be an example so my daughter will stand up for her beliefs or maybe it’s because I’m quickly nearing the 30 year mark and feel like it’s finally time for me to really figure out who I am, or maybe it’s because I’m tired of keeping in my thoughts and feelings. Regardless, I figured what better way to “put myself out there” than to write a blog that anyone, anywhere can read. Perhaps, in the process, I’ll learn to be proud of my ideas, stick up for my beliefs, and at the very least, have a written record of who I am to pass along to those I love.
For now, nobody in my life knows I’m writing this. That may change. In the meantime, I’m proud to unveil me, Pixy Mom. Welcome to my life!
