Crunchy leaves swirl wildly in the vortex.
I stand mesmerized each time I see them spin. Where is this unseen, whirling wind and how do the leaves always find it? My life is like these leaves. One minute gently floating and the next spinning out of control.
As the autumn leaves dance and fall, my soul stirs and stills. Something in this season grants permission to enjoy the chaos I see. If anything else spilled from the sky, collected everywhere, hid the familiar, calamity would strike.
But these beautiful, dead leaves bring peace and knowing. They fall chaotic, yes, but there is divine order in their very being. They remind that the earth is ushering in a deep sleep.
A time of rest and restoration is on its way.
In my life, too, I feel the chaos. The dreams I once held, the person I used to be, the masks I once wore are no more. They swirled away in a vortex of change. My soul is like the last leaf that clings to the tree. You know the one? I always notice those lone beauties. The others let go, set themselves free, and trust the divine wind to carry them.
Oh how I want to do that. To trust God’s control and let His whirling Spirit send me on a divine dance. I know He can. Why am I still here clinging?
I close my eyes and breathe. Letting go of the chaos in my mind requires a deep exhale and a shift.
It’s easy to talk to God, but I’m still learning to listen.
When it happens, my heart stills in wonder. It’s not an audible voice. More like a deep knowing from within. And peace. Lots of peace.
In Old Testament Bible days people literally heard the voice of God out loud. Then God spoke through the prophets. When the time was right, He spoke through His Son. And now He speaks within. As I watch the leaves spin, He speaks.
What do you have for me today, Lord? I’m listening. I’ve set down my agenda and laid my fears at your feet. Help be open to your spirit. Please tell me.
I listen. I close my eyes and hold a vision of Jesus in my mind. I set my pen on the paper and write what I hear Him saying to me.
Did I really hear Him? I believe so.
The messages that came from my pen were words of hope, complete opposite of the fearful voice that filled my head.
“You are closer to healing than you think.
I will give you the strength you need to carry on.
It may not always be comfortable, but it will always be doable with me.
Do not doubt me or you will be like a wave tossed on the wind.
Let go and trust me. You will be healed.
Don’t fight the fear, give it to me instead.